Saturday night my family attended the wedding of my cousin's daughter. It took place in a small town in Southeast Arkansas. I didn't even know this place existed. We traveled to a lake home for the outdoor wedding that started at 7:00 pm. I must mention that this day happened to break weather records as being the hottest day! We were able to capture a tiny breeze every so often from the lake. It was not frequent enough to dispel our discomfort. I want to give you as detailed a description of these lovely nuptials as I can. Maybe you can get the same joy/shock that I got.
We drive to the lake property to find a long fishing/swimming dock decorated with white lace and small lights mingled in. There is a long walkway to get to this dock. On the dock there are some folding chairs that, we are told, will be for the immediate family. On the bank are more chairs that are for the remainder of the guests. The wedding guests are a small number. This is to be expected since the invitation was by word of mouth and not a formal one that would have been mailed. We are a little bit early, so we take our seats on the bank of this lake and watch the ducks swim while are ears are splitting with classical music booming from a portable stereo. The sound is turned up so high that it is painful for us. I boldly walk to the stereo and turn the music down to an enjoyable level, one that allows us to actually hold conversations while we listen. We watch a motley crew of individuals arrive in various forms of dress. We saw guests in shorts (very casual), sundresses, and even two suits. I kept my eyes on those two in case I was needed to administer first aid for the heat stroke they were surely going to have in this 100+ temperature. There were people here from all walks of life.
For a little background, the bride was able to overcome extraordinary circumstances to escape the life she was born into. Her mother is an alcoholic that gets increasingly worse each day. Her father, my cousin (and it turns out not really her father) is a meth addict who has been in prison a couple of times. Her biological father, a brief affair her mother had, is an alcoholic and has served a couple of prison terms as well. The bride, K, has put herself through college, has a nice career, and put this wedding together herself because she was afraid that her mother would spoil it with her drunken high jinx.
Okay, back to the wedding….As we are sitting on the bank waiting for the wedding to start, the bridegroom's father comes over to meet my extended family. All of my mother's sisters are present as well as my sister and our kids. My aunt has also brought her grandson. The groom's father goes to my aunt, the grandmother of the bride, and gives her a big hug. Let me just mention that he looks like he just stepped out of Woodstock. He then goes to my sister and gives her a big hug and then turns to me. My nickname for him is "Cop a Feel". He totally grosses us out. My other aunts give off a "don't you dare try to cop a feel from me" aura so he bypasses them. I've gotta tell ya… This is the first time anyone has wanted to get that close to me at a wedding. Maybe he thought he could kill two birds with one stone. Attend his son's wedding and pick up a date for the reception.
Eventually the wedding begins. Coming down the aisle (grass) are two little boys in shorts. One is carrying a ring pillow and the other is carrying a fishing pole! That's a first for me too! Then two little girls walk by spreading beautiful flower petals in their beautiful little dresses and bare feet. The maid of honor comes by in a pretty gown with a small bouquet. I forgot to mention that the groom and the best man are dressed in black shirts and khaki shorts. We wondered if the bride was going to be as casual. We anxiously wait for the bride to make her entrance. Guess what? It was another first for me! The Bride and her Biological father come from quite a ways back in the property in an all terrain vehicle. It must have been the formal version because it had a top on it. The ATV takes her to the beginning of the aisle where she is handed off to her father. Meanwhile, he has to put out his cigarette to walk her down the aisle. She is dressed in a beautiful gown and looks like a Greek goddess. The wedding continues with only one small glitch. The minister says it is time to say the vows. K gets a panicked look on her face and whispers "Do I have to say anything? I didn't write my own vows." To which the minister replies, " Just say I do at the appropriate spot." She sighs her relief as a title of laughter goes around. The guests are then entertained with an idolesque performance of Love Can Build A Bridge and I'll Stand By You. Don't get me wrong…the singing was beautiful…it was just styled more for a pop performance than a wedding performance.
Did I mention how hot it was? All the guests were drenched with perspiration. I think if anyone had dared us, we would all have gladly moved our seats into the lake just to get cool. We began gathering up our things to go to another residence for the reception. On the walk back to the cars my little YaYa asks her Nana why our group was so dressed up and no one else was. My aunt replied " Because our mother taught us better!". This appeases YaYa.
We travel a few miles to the reception and see some tables decorated nicely. There is a beautiful fountain streaming out lukewarm punch (I guess to help cool us down from the oh so hot temps). They do have a beautiful wedding cake. Behind the cake table you have an assortment of ice chests with ice cold soft drinks and more lukewarm water. To the right of the cake table there is a pot luck spread to rival any family reunion or picnic. The bride's father has assembled a few of his musician buddies and they perform for us. They were actually pretty good. By this time it is dark. After about 30 minutes of being shrouded in this darkness, someone has one of those genius moments. They wheel their car around, point it at the crowd, and turn the headlights on high beam. Thus, our romantic reception lighting is taken care of. Only a few people needed to move back some to escape the harsh glare. The bride and groom join us to partake of the food and fun. She has matched her groom in an outfit of tank top and shorts. A reception outfit any beach would be proud of. The highlight of the evening was when I hear a bloodcurdling scream and see LiLi running for her life along with YaYa grabbing BooBoo and hightailing to me as fast as they can. I would have been embarrassed at their screaming and running in the midst of this reception except they are screaming "Snake, Snake" as they are running. Immediately the stoner looking men run to the area to teach that snake a lesson. It is at this point that my mind has taken in far too much excitement and shock for one day and our family takes our leave.
On the way out I see the bride and give her a hug and tell her how beautiful she looked in her gown. She has tears in her eyes as she thanks our family for coming to the wedding. At this point I realize that to me it was quite the fiasco or red neck celebration….but to this young lady it was the most wonderful day of her life. She did the best she could with what she had. I wished then that I could have flown her and her groom to a beach resort where they could have had a gorgeous outdoor wedding to rival anything Martha Stewart could do. This young deserves so much more than she has ever been given in life. I am just glad that for her, the wedding was beautiful and a wonderful success. Her mother did show up drunk but she managed not to end up in the lake or some other embarrassing situation. It just shows that we all measure success in different degrees.
Congratulations K. I hope you have a beautiful life with your wonderful, kind husband.
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